The Art of Selling Oneself.

I have an interview tomorrow for a prospective internship at a very broadly-read travel magazine - well it's as broadly read as travel magazines get - and I'm just a liiiittllee bit terrified. The whole concept of an interview just makes me uncomfortable... all that subtle ass-kissing and self-glorification; it makes me want to bail.

Right now, I'm going through the 'prepping' process; making sure my resume is in order, putting together a portfolio of my work, doing some reseach on the publication...practicing my handshake. I feel as though a lot rides on a well excecuted handshake, and I really have no idea why, but it's something I have had drummed into me since childhood...that, and don't talk to strangers. I can remember hearing things like: 'the handshake must be firm, but not overpowering, it should not be drawn out for too much time and always look the owner of the opposing hand in the eye during a shake. A weak handshake implies a lack of self-assurance and in the business world is a major no-no.'

This is where my problem with interviews lies: you are being judged from the moment you meet; even on the way you touch the interviewers hand. What the hell? That just freakssss me out. You see, me, i'm the kind of person who walks into desks and stutters when nervous, i'm the person you see who spills coffee on their shirt or beetroot on their jeans (true story), i'm the sort of person who somehow manages to screw up a handshake...

Even when it is a 'casual' interview...it never actually is. There is this totally manufactured relaxed vibe that everyone knows is bullshit, coz you're still there to try and get the job and they're still there to scrutinize you. I usually sit there willing the time to pass, waiting for the formalities to end and wishing I could skip to the part when I call a friend and complain about how I went. It's pretty funny reliving the course of the interview once it's over (well, most of the time) ...going over whatever crap you scrambled together in order to make yourself seem a whole lot better than you really are. 'Sure I can speak fluent Italian' (I can construct basic sentences), 'I have an extremely high wpm average' (I use facebook a lot), 'I really really love kids, or the clothing at cotton on, or tupperware' (I want the money).

Luckily, or maybe unluckily, I actually do enjoy the magazine I'm prepping for; I don't have to lie about a great love of some product I don't give a damn about, which really adds to the nerves. I know these things are almost always less scary than we mentally build them up to be, but having a panel of strangers judge whether of not they would like to pick you for their team is pretty damn unnerving. Who knows though, maybe if watch where I step, speak slowly, keep away from coloured foods or drinks and hold a steady hand, mayybbeee it just might go okay.